It has been 6-months and 2 weeks since I have started the mindfulness journey. It has been a difficult time in keeping up with this training. For the past few months, I have been thinking about taking a break from this training as I have not been able to execute it the way I envisaged it when I started. However, I did not want to easily give up. But now the time has come to take a deep breath and stop for a while… Continue reading
It is late night as per my standards – around 1030 PM. But I want to post this update when I am still in this beautiful place called Kotagiri, a hillstation in Tamil Nadu. I came here to spend a few days with my family as the kids have gotten holidays for a local festival and I had absolutely beautiful time here – I am so grateful for this episode of reflection and rejuvenation that is granted by my Loving Lord. I have come here 2-years back and I can sense how much more blissful this time the journey/stay has been and I attribute a part of this experience to the mindfulness training.
Though we are away from home, we were treated to homestyle food and excellent hospitality at this little cosy cottage named Moonshadow. What an apt name for the resort as we got to see the wonderful waning crescent moon and its shadow showing us the full-circle of the moon which is not easily visible – We got to see this wonderful sight right from our balcony and we got so much joy in watching the sunrise and sunset together as a family!
Now let us get on to the progress update…
It was around 345 AM on Jan 1, 2017 and I came out to the balcony to start my day with mindful observation of the sky and creation around – it has been about a month since I have started this new habit. Typically, I am alone, undisturbed by anyone – the entire surrounding is very silent. But this day, I saw a number of bikes coming into our street and only then I realized that this is new year’s day and these young boys/girls must be coming back from new year parties. This got me thinking about the new year parties and the whole hype around celebrating new year…
3-months just got over since I have started the journey on mindfulness training. Any mindful reader would have noticed that I have not posted my weekly updates for the last 4 weeks now. Last update I did was about a month back, in which I have promised to write about the item that toppled my mindfulness journey completely. Here I go…
Last week was unusual – a number of events happened, some of them I had control over and some of them I had no control over. Given that I was practicing mindfulness, both set of events should have been easier to handle : What I had control over, I should have been able to take calm and well-thought-out actions and what I did not have control over, I should have done the best I could do and leave the rest to the Almighty. What is surprising about the turn of events is this: the events that should have made me reactive and negative did not make me reactive but made me more mindful and hence grateful. But the events which were 100% under my control made me reactive to the extent I ended up falling sick. The villain from the inside, the Judge or the Nafs, succeeded in getting me out of the mindfulness zone. Continue reading
I am writing this update very late this week – I was unwell for a few days and that made it difficult to spend time blogging. However, I do not want to break the weekly pattern. Hence, here is a short update about 2 mindful experiences that I had: One led me to experience bliss in a very mundane activity like bathing and another one led me to realize one of the most profound lessons on parenting – one that I realized only a few years back, but still keep stumbling in implementing it.
Last week has been a week of stress testing for my mindfulness training. In every new undertaking, there comes a time when the question arises – Is this journey worth it? Am I capable of crossing this bridge? Last week had turned out to be such a time for me where I could observe a lot of commotion in my mind about this mindfulness journey.
For the record, here is my performance on 100 PQ reps: I did not do 100 reps on even one day. In fact, I did not even remember to count. But on the positive side, I was aware of my mind-chatter most of the times and I was able to bring back my mind to calmness by focusing on my breathing or some other physical sensation (this is the essence of a PQ rep – calm your mind by focusing on a physical sensation).